Deliciously lost again

New paint and new canvases! 

This week in the studio was brought to me by yellow ochre, one of my favorite colors. I tried out a new, wonderful yellow ochre paint by Sennelier and had three new 16x20" canvases to work with, thanks to recent sales! I started on two of the 16x20's and continued adding more layers to several of the small works while I completely reworked the 12x48" canvas. My studio continues to be a hive of activity. 

Ten works in progress wait patiently to be worked on

I severely limited my palette and really pushed the charcoal aspect of the paintings. I had forgotten how much I love the watery greys and blacks of charcoal thinned out with water and rubbed away with a rag. I had a few moments of sheer joy and excitement at what I remembered while painting this week. I was able to get to that place where the self almost vanishes while working. Oh, how I love that place!

A painting that thinks it might be done

I was also reminded about the power of showing up. I was feeling a bit under the weather and had considered skipping my studio time to rest one day but I went in anyway. I decided to focus only on one piece, the 12x48" canvas. I told myself all I had to do was add a layer of paint and listen to my music. All I had to do was show up and be compassionate towards myself. All I had to do was lower my expectations and be present. I was richly rewarded.

detail

As I used the yellow ochre and charcoal I got deliciously lost again. Words, thoughts and emotions came to mind, a working title even floated to the surface; phases of a lovesick brain. I thought that title was a bit much but I followed the path. Three abstracted organic forms in shades of black charcoal and grey popped against the layers of yellow along the long slim canvas.

detail

The painting came in one solid flash seemingly from somewhere beyond. I was entranced while I worked and when I was finished, I cried. I felt like I had unlocked that elusive door where all the good stuff lives, just waiting.

detail

I will be in the studio again tomorrow and I can't wait. I don't know what door might open or what will be waiting for me. I can't wait to vanish once again into the inky blacks and greys and the hard dusty edges of the charcoal. I can't wait to wade into the blocks of color, drips and layers.

It's so good to be back.