You think you've had two years (this weekend) to go inside yourself and listen deeply to your wants and needs and to create a new personal mission statement for the way you want to live on this planet.
But you didn't.
How could any of us think like that while the world is on fire and there are so many loud voices coming at us from all sides? Did some listicle shame you and the way you coped? So many voices telling us to get clear on our goals, get fit, get organised, go deep, make your mark, leave what no longer serves, get angry, fight the power, and save the planet. All the while fighting for social and economic justice, raising a good family or loving the one you're with while staying informed on politics, world news, and what's trending. Clap for carers and front line workers, bargain shop, and mind how long you leave the lights on and did you mourn in an acceptable way across your socials, did you virtue signal or just support the right causes?
How the fuck are we supposed to do all of this while being beautiful, creative, talented, well-read, well-travelled, and well-loved. And of course, let's not forget the people who didn't skip a beat, you just got on with it, kept calm and carried on and "fuck it, this is my one life when it's time, it's time..."
The pandemic is not over, war rages in many places that we are not paying attention to today, and of course on our poor mother earth. Politicians are chipping away at our democracy while stealing from the poor and we know that straight white males are the only ones that had a fair shake anyway, so why the fuck are they so angry?
And yet, I need to paint a painting? I need to stay relevant, make a sale, go to an exhibition, say something beautiful, add a bit of joy to the world or express my rage in painterly form? Hmm. I am not so sure about that.
Ah Megan, feeling your pain and yet…you write so well. Your words hold so much raw intensity and truth.
ReplyDeleteYou might not want to paint or write but that’s such a shame because you create impact when you do either.
This world is a mess and it feels like we’re simply observing most of its tragedies. The only way I can cope is to make my world smaller and try to nourish that tiny part.
All those little parts add up though don’t they?
Big love to you ❤️
Thank you, Amanda for reading and for your empathetic response and compliment about my writing. I hear you about making your world smaller and nourishing that tiny part - that is what I have been doing as well.Those little parts do add up and are what matters. Big love to you too. Thanks for sharing. ❤️
Deletewell-said, well-put.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Brandon! I appreciate you taking the time to read and comment.
DeleteIt seems to be a kind of loop to me.... we look beyond ourselves to all the pain and impossibility of the world and know we want to act. And yet it's too big, too beyond our reach, our control. As Amanda says, somehow the larger folds back in to the smaller that we can see and touch, where it matters to write, to speak, to connect, and sometimes, to offer a non-verbal response through art that means more to the world beyond us than we understand. The way that you live, and write, and paint, and witness, helps all of us.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Tamsin for reading, your thoughtful comment, and as ever for your friendship and support. x
DeleteYou're spot on, as always! You're such an eloquent writer. I think it was all too much, even before the last two years - they've just been the icing on the cake! But somehow this is where we are now..? Keep putting your brush to canvas. It makes the world a better place.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Julia! That means a lot coming from you as I enjoy your writing so much. I think you are right - I think it has been heading this way for a long time now and perhaps these two years was just the last straw. Thank you for your support and encouragement - we artists have to stick together. xx
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