200 breadcrumbs to get to this place

A stack of my latest paintings on paper

March. It's been one hell of a month. I am feeling pretty worn out and grateful to have arrived at the weekend. I haven't been using words on the studio blog lately as I am using them elsewhere. 

This David Lynch meme found on the internet is relatable.
Just substitute painting for the word film. 

The sun brightens the room after a series of darker and stormy days. The light is lovely, though my phone tells me more rain is coming in a couple of hours. I am content to sit in the sun (however temporary) and listen to music as I type. 

I have painted over 200 pieces since the 29th of January. Of course, many are just process works - breadcrumbs on the path to somewhere else. Right now, it's all about returning to the energy and the regularity of the practice. This flurry of activity has been about getting reacquainted with why I paint and draw at all. It's about why I have painted and drawn my entire life. 

It's always a re-learning at first, or it feels that way. The return. What lines, what colours, what movements, what compositions, what materials, what moves me? What moves my hand, eye, brain, and heart? What lines are mine, and which lines are borrowed? Do I lean on a trick, a technique, a motif? And why do I lean on it? What does it say about me and how I want to feel? Is it a trick? All the questions swirl and dance while I work. The music is perfect. The music isn't right. Go back again and repeat the song that works - the song and the line meld and get stronger. Taking me away. 

Just this past week, the work is starting to trust me again. It's holding me for longer and is starting to talk and tell me where to go. I have had to paint these 200 breadcrumbs to get to this place. Painting is a relationship one must tend. 

Thank you for being here and for all the positive feedback I have received about these latest pieces of work. I appreciate it. I can't and don't want to create in a vacuum. The process and ritual are for me, but the work needs you too. 

Consider leaving me a wee tip for the paintings (48 over on Facebook) I have shared for free this month. Thank you for supporting my work. 

Special thanks to my monthly supporters: Jennifer Libby Fay, Tamsin Haggis, Jennifer Douglas Arbuckle, and the late Pat Bremner.