Trying to make my way back

The puzzle says "seek magic every day." I do. 

Hello, lovely studio blog readers. 

I hope you are well. Today I am going to try to make my way back to you. If you have been following this blog for quite some time you will know that it is a fundamental element of my art practice and how I share information and my process with my patrons, fellow artists, and art lovers. I have a substantial gap in my posts currently. I don't like that so my one task today is to slowly fill in some of the gaps, starting with the most recent and working backwards. This break was necessary for a multitude of reasons but the longer the break, the harder it is to return. This has happened with my blog, my video visits, and all my regular postings on social media as well as the most important thing of all, creating the art. 

Not making art is a complex issue - if I don't make art, what do I have to say or share here on the studio blog, what do I have to make my Tuesday Studio Video Visits about? What do I have to share on my social media accounts? The answer is actually plenty. There are loads of paintings you probably haven't seen or you have forgotten about. I could write more in-depth about them or make more videos about those pieces and the process involved in making them. 

However, social media and internalised capitalism are a sick mix - we have this urgency to stay current, fresh, relevant, and to churn out shite just to have something to post and share. I don't know about you, but I didn't "get into" art to become a machine. Paintings take time, bodies of work and the exploration of themes take time to flesh out - not everything is made for the "wham, bam, click, heart, scroll" world of today. 

However, I also know that as someone who has called myself an artist for half of my life on this planet, I need to do the work. I have been compelled and called to do the work and then that calling went a bit quiet and now I am going to have to coax it back out onto the playing field. 

This is going to require faith, optimism, hard work, and time in the studio. It is going to require finding something inside myself that became fearful, sad, uneasy or more honestly, pissed off. I will need to work to steady all of this to create again. 

So, here I go - filling one gap, writing one post, and expressing a few thoughts. Finding my way back. 

I hope you are well, happy, and inspired and if not, tomorrow is another day. Keep fighting and thank you for being here. 

Our family tree made of charcoal dust

I spent Sunday at my open studio enjoying the conversations I had as people wandered in and out throughout the day. Not a penny was made. I notice I feel almost apologetic to "admit the truth" when folks ask me how it went. Making a penny would have been nice but it wasn't my sole aim, it never has been. I'm here for the banter, I said as I smiled.

After getting my studio organised for the event, I decided to continue the fun by hosting an online studio sale as the week went on. It's important to have a good clear out every once in a while as well as staying true to my belief that art is for all or that at least it can be for most. While my gallery pieces may retail for higher prices, I always try to keep some smaller paper works, process pieces, and sketches back at more affordable prices.

20x16"/ 50x40cm 2018
Mixed media Linen textured archival paper
SOLD

Decay paper series
23x23cm/9x9"
Heavyweight folded cotton rag paper
charcoal not fixed, handle with care and frame
Signed on back
SOLD

I'm delighted that two works on paper from my studio sale sold yesterday. After twenty plus years of being a painter, each sale is still celebrated, each sale gives me hope and encouragement and helps me live this artist's life. Whether £5.00 or £5,000 each one is a thrill and I am honoured and thankful. The painting part may be a solitary venture but the sharing of my art and a patron deciding to live with my work is an act of solidarity, community, and support that I never forget.

This is a delicate balance- this life and calling. I gingerly walk on a high, fine line. My patrons are the net below. My faith in the alchemy of art helps guide each step forward on the path. I am here for the craft, the mystery, the freedom (and the banter too). I am here because I know this is where I belong and it's through painting that I find myself and my community. This is our high, fine line walking lineage. This is our family tree made of charcoal dust.

Thank you.

Dark Sketches Transition number 1
Original, signed on the back
Mixed media on acid-free 300 gsm/140lb Watercolour paper
A5 size/ 210 x 148mm 8.3 x 5.9"
£45 Free Shipping in the UK. Contact me for details.

Dark Sketches Transition number 2
Original, signed on the back
Mixed media on acid-free 300 gsm/140lb Watercolour paper
A5 size/ 210 x 148mm 8.3 x 5.9"
£45 Free Shipping in the UK. Contact me for details.

Dark Sketches Transition number 3
Original, signed on the back
Mixed media on acid-free 300 gsm/140lb Watercolour paper
A5 size/ 210 x 148mm 8.3 x 5.9"
£45 Free Shipping in the UK. Contact me for details.

Faith

Getting close to completion on these four commissions. These paintings are based on work from four different series of mine spanning over ten years. I am honoured and grateful to be working on this exciting project with Paper+White, award-winning interior design and art specialists with studios in London's East End and Cambridgeshire.

Days spent doubting I am a painter are wasted days but they will happen again for me and for you. As natural as breathing, the doubt and eventually the painting. This is no ordinary calling but this is what I call myself. My strength, my power, my constant companion, each painting a construction, building a more resilient foundation. A bridge between us, strangers no more.