Whether in art or life

Scottish National Portrait Gallery 

So here we are, it's almost the holidays or the festive winter break, Solstice, Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, and whatever else you may celebrate. Perhaps, you enjoy Festivus.

The next two weeks may be quiet and weird with extra heaviness to navigate for some and for some, it will be light, bright, and easy. For many it will be a combination of nostalgia, guilt, religion, and capitalism. I used to like the holidays more - not the shopping part, or the wrapping part, or the logistics in seeing all the people that needed to be seen. I enjoyed the sparkling bits and the magical parts. At some point, things ceased sparkling in the same way and seemed much less magical. And each year since, if I have managed to find the sparkle in some way, it has been a real triumph. And I do manage. I am sitting here in a festive corner of my own design and my sparkly resilience is on full display. I enjoy my rituals and familiar ways of doing things even with certain adjustments.

I used my somewhat dulled creativity to conjure up my festive corner, using mostly what I had on hand to change the look and feel of the space. I enjoy putting things in groups and making it "just so." I probably should have been a set or window dresser or interior decorator. I miss creating spaces and vignettes.

Art is about making things "just so" but in a loose way. So that's what I will endeavour to do, create space and make it just right, whether in art or life. 

I plan to use this time to check in with friends and family, rest, recalibrate, and enjoy the time off from my job. I plan to have a residency of sorts while the world is a bit more quiet and return to my art, which has been a bit sidelined. When I write next week's post (my year end review) you will be curious by what I mean by "sidelined," as it probably won't seem that way to you, but I can be a bit of a task master. 

However you spend your day next Wednesday, I wish you beauty and peace.

Thank you for being here, the world needs you and the gifts you bring. 

Grocery lists

There is a song for the feeling. 

Your ghost lives here

Musical interlude...

My brushes are clean

I gave my brushes a good bath (the pictures above are after the bath). I did some technical things relating to my art career. I went out and saw some good art around town. I said no to an opportunity. Another opportunity ended and another showed up. I listened to music and I talked to good people. I worked and I sang and I took a risk.

It's the start of August. 

Already. 

And my brushes are clean.

We might could

Falling to earth

A certain detatched sadness

Your tender heart

That's right

 Seems to be a theme.

Order of operations

 

Hello to the strong winds that brought me here

 

I click my heels together

Listen

She talks to rainbows

I painted before I patched

Dirty boots

Hello. Here we are again on an actual Friday. 

Thanks for checking out the Friday Studio Blog. I hope you are doing well. I am sitting out in the sun while I write this. Thanks again to everyone who came out to support the artists of the Out of the Blue Drill Hall last week for our exhibition, Outside + In. The show came down last Saturday at 5pm. It was good to spend so much time in the hall for that week - it was like pushing a pause button on my grief. Art has always protected me in that way. 

This week I found myself plunged back into the trenches and didn't feel my best but I still managed to do a few art-related things. First, I did go to the studio on Tuesday and I decided to patch the holes and repaint my painting wall. I also looked at my paint supplies and just handled a few things in the space. I also managed to record my Tuesday Studio Video Visit! I haven't recorded one in a long time, so that was a relief to do and to do it from the studio. 

Here it is if you missed it on social media. 

I have to admit I didn't feel my best in the space at the time. That space sometimes feels like it is filled with the old ghosts of my hopes and dreams and a heavy dose of punishment. Sometimes it feels like I must go to that room to prove I am working. I must go to that room and prove I am busy and deserving of the space. I must go to that room to make myself scarce. I must go there to be contained. To be my wild self but enclosed in a windowless space where I won't bother anyone. I must go to that room to prove my dedication, worth, and my value. I must earn love and appreciation in that room. 

Heavy wee room, eh? Aye. Fuck that noise. 

So I have to exorcise it and that's what I just did. I just smudged it with the truth. Feelings come and go and feelings shared, lose their power. I am exorcising a lot. Some of you will be here for it and others might need to bail out. That's cool. 

On that same Tuesday, I also saw a fleeting exhibition by another studio mate (Ian Gonczarow). I haven't yet met him but now I have seen his work in the hall and that is a good thing - hopefully, I will meet him soon. More community the better. More art in the building, the better too. I had a good chat with an art worker in the building and my studio mate and then went to hers for lunch and I enjoyed a sunny walk home.

Wednesday (4 weeks of missing Theo) was heavy and I did hard things. Thursday, I ran errands and rewarded myself for the hard things I accomplished and was gifted with a bit of anxiety for my efforts. Yoga and meditation were required as was a book in the sun that evening. Today in the sun as I write this, I love feeling warm, surrounded by flowers, and being outside and free. I love the transportive quality of the music I am listening to - it takes me everywhere. 

In other news, I got another copy of The Artists Way and decided it was time to surrender to that process again. If you know, you know... I'm doing my morning pages and the artist's dates will follow. I got myself an A2 drawing board - it will be here soon. 

In the meantime, I am walking, walking, walking... 

"The position of the artist is humble. He (She) is essentially a channel." - Piet Mondrian

That's all I have for you this week on the Friday Studio Blog. If you missed a few posts, please go back and check them out. Thanks so much for your support!

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