Make the time

After last week's celebrations. It was back to work with good amounts of rain, wind, and strong bursts of sun. I tracked the light as it danced around the flat. I also developed a photographic relationship with an Amaryllis as it came into bloom. 

I wrote in my journal on the 11th of March:

There is potential in all of us under the right conditions and if we are shown care and patience. 

I have had this Amaryllis bulb since late November (with the idea of forcing it for Christmas). Even after following the directions on the box there remained no life. I was about to give up on it, thinking it was a dud.

Inspired by seeing my mother's blooming Amaryllis over our video calls, I decided to try a few different tactics to encourage it to thrive. Low and behold it started springing to life in February and now it has bloomed. It is outrageously beautiful. 

Sometimes the rules/directions need breaking or changing because they don't apply to the subject. We can gently persevere with patience and care. We can ask what is needed. This Amaryllis needed extra support and it needed more time - it would not be forced.

The flower is an oracle and teacher. 
Make time to listen. 
_______________

The world is a mess and I am glad you are here, sharing your gifts. Take care until next week.

Could I tell you anything more?

Could I tell you anything more
mixed media on 200gsm acid-free paper
42x59.4cm/16.5x23.4"
©2020 Megan Chapman

What can I tell you now?

I am grateful for the flowers and the honest conversations. 

I am grateful for bowls of soup served on the tables of friends.

I am grateful for the "Just checking in..." and "Hows you?" lighting up my phone. 

I am grateful for the sounds of nature: birdsong, wind, and waves. 

I am grateful for dreams, new ideas, and laughter. 

I am grateful for the tall grass as it dances. 

Oh, what a beautiful world. 

Thank you sun, moon, stars, and music. 

Thank you art, film, and culture. 

Alchemy, magic, and mystery. 

Thank you.

Message from an unknown sender

I went to the studio on Monday and a new painting showed up; dark, veiled, and mysterious. Filled with broken rules, muddy colours, and no distinct vantage point. It came fast and strong, the title too. This was a message from an unknown sender. A message that I was very happy to receive. It unnerved and excited me and provided some sense of relief.

The start of a new series brings a type of fever and remembering back into the process of painting. I love having a framework, the foundation to work and play in. I need a reason. I don't paint because I don't know what else to do with my time or hands. Honestly, I spend a lot of my time resisting painting. Balancing that uncomfortable dangerous undercurrent, that anxiety that will finally push me to get back to the "serious" work (whatever that means). This week the "serious" work showed up again. The kind of work, I love the most.

Just as I love the colour white and most colours (really - look back at my earlier work), I also love black and darkness (again, look back at my earlier work and the "dark landscapes"). We were trained not to use black and white if you could ever use another colour. I like breaking rules. Muddy paintings are also considered bad form, and some of my earlier paintings are so clean and vibratory you'd think a machine painted them. But, I like a bit of mud, a dirty veil on the surface of the painting, a bit of dullness over the brighter colours below. Remember the shock after they cleaned the Sistine Chapel ceiling... I liked it before (and after). Think of all the reproductions we have come to love because we were looking at old, yellowed and dirty paintings before they were cleaned and restored.

Darker paintings might not work with your decor or match your sofa, they might not sell in galleries as easily as their colourful and "fun" fellow paintings (I know this to be true - why do you think I stopped with the dark landscapes). Darker paintings will, however,  thrill me and I think that is a very good reason to receive their message. So I call out to the darkness and crack open the studio door, I invite it in. The dark warmth envelopes, the other colours reach out from underneath, the veil lifts and welcomes us into the fold with mystery and yet something familiar we all recognise.

Until next week, keep fighting.

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With my open eyes and heart

Friday again, and sadly no new painting to share this week either, but I did paint and I did look at clouds.

I spent the whole day in my studio painting the same painting over again and again on Monday. Here is a detail of that which no longer exists.


I went to a toxic waste site/poisoned town on Tuesday.

dream house, Picher Oklahoma © 2010 Megan Chapman

I gave a lecture/tour on Thursday.

I meditated in the woods today.
(and I remembered how much I love the sound of running water)

Tilly Willy Bridge © 2010 Megan Chapman

I have some strange ideas about April, May and June...
Now, here is a lovely video. Until next week, keep fighting.